Tonight, Lindsey and I were treated to an advance screening of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.  Details of our good fortune can be found here.  We sat to watch the film with many of our Twitter friends, such as @leftybrown and @mrsleftybrown, @ChrisHangsleben and @KarmaKaze7, @DanielDanger, and more!  Before the film began, however, came a series of trivia questions from @mikeoz of the Fresno Beehive.  I managed to answer the question directed at my group, “Who played Dumbledore?”  I quickly raised my hand and answered, “Michael Gambon.”  I was rewarded with a Dark Mark LED pointer, and a pair of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince posters.  Very cool swag!

Before I continue with my review, allow me to present this warning to our readers:  If you have not read the book, and do not wish to have certain key elements of the story spoiled, then I suggest you read no further.  Instead, why not read Moral Kombat, Twilight vs. Harry Potter, or about Tweetdeck on the iPhone!

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Still here?  Good!  Onwards and upwards, then!

We were finally nearing the end of our wait.  First, however, the previews!  The previews seemed very promising at first, starting with the Robert Downey, Jr. / Jude Law version of Sherlock Holmes.  The film seemed like fun, although I took issue with Sherlock Holmes being more of an action hero than I remember from my reading.  From here, the previews went to pot, for the most part.  Following Sherlock Holmes was the upcoming G.I. Joe movie which, from what I have seen, has very little to do with the G.I. Joe series I remember as a child.  After that came a rather terrible trailer for an upcoming Disney animation, The Princess and the Frog.  To be perfectly honest, the only thing I remember about the preview following the Disney garbage is the title, Shorts, and only because we had written it down.  At the very end, however, we were redeemed with a wonderful preview for Where the Wild Things Are, the film adaptation of one of the most memorable children’s books in generations.  Lindsey and I are looking forward to this movie with great anticipation.

But I’m sure you’re not here to read about the previews, now are you?  On to business, then.  Another warning for our readers: Here, there be spoilers.

Keep in mind that this review is written from the perspective of one who has read the book multiple times.  Also, apologies for the images.  We were unable to take photos during the advance screening, so all we have to offer is the best Google search could produce.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, while setting up the main story elements necessary for the events of the seventh book, The Deathly Hallows, to unfold, does so in a way that is nearly unrecognizable.  The main events, such as Dumbledore’s death by the hand of Severus Snape, the finding of the Horcrux and the discovery that it is false, the recruitment of Horace Slughorn, and the acquisition of his most imporant memory, and the developing romances are all present, but not all in the way that they should be.  Dumbledore’s return to the castle with Harry after finding the Horcrux is radically different from the book, as are the subsequent events.  There is no Dark Mark, there is no battle between the invading Death Eaters and the staff and students, and there is no funeral service.

Dumbledore is slain by Severus Snape, but the setting and situation were very different.  Horace Slughorn’s recruitment was fairly accurate, but only the final, successful attempt at the recovery of the memory is remotely accurate.  The romances seem to take center stage in this film when they should be secondary.  Excessive focus is placed on the development of the romances of the three main characters, while other developments are introduced fully formed, with no explanation.  The timeline in which some of the romances occur is very different as well.

A great deal is left out of this movie that should have been included.   I will grant that, at two and a half hours, they were already at their time limit.  However, I can not accept this as a valid excuse for the exclusion of many important plot and character development points.  Why, do you ask?  There were many scenes of excessive length created for the movie that had no basis whatsoever in the book: the opening sequence with the Death Eater attack on the bridge, the attack and destruction of the Burrow, and other, smaller scenes.  I believe that, rather than creating new content for the film, the existing story should have been portrayed as fully as possible.  I think this would have made for a better film, and by far a better plot.  There was so much plot development left out of this film that it felt, in the words of @leftybrown, “paper thin.”

The film, however, was well directed.  The camera angles were well done.  The cinematography was very good.  The sound was excellent, and the special effects were, most of the time, stunning.  Dumbledore’s ring of protective fire in the Horcrux cave was spectacular.  His death was well filmed, evoking just the right set of emotions.  In all, the technical work of the film was fantastic.

Unfortunately, technical excellence is not enough to make up for glaring faults with the plot and the translation.  I still recommend seeing it, if you are at all immersed in the Harry Potter universe.  I warn you, however, not to hold your expectations too high.  Enjoy the movie as a simple movie, rather than an adaptation, and you might come out happier than I did.

-Because I said so

Browsing around on Youtube, I came across this video that made me laugh so damn hard. It’s from RecklessTortuga, a sketch comedy group from Los Angeles. If you are a fan of either Twilight (gag) or Harry Potter (yay!), be sure to watch this video (it also pretty much solidifies my reasons for NOT wanting to watch Twilight).

For more RecklessTortuga, check them out on Youtube, Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter. If you do check them out on Youtube, I highly suggest you watch their “Psycho Girlfriend” videos. I will be blogging about those sometime this week. Absolutely hilarious!

- She Who Has The Last Word

In the days of my youth, I was told what it means to be a man.

Midnight premieres.

I have been to many midnight premieres in the years that I have walked upon the earth.  I revel in the atmosphere of a midnight premiere.  I rejoice in the opportunity to interact with my people.  The true believers, not just in the content, but in the medium itself, make themselves known.  This is the ultimate movie-going event, save one.

Advance screenings.

The advance screening, while less likely to equal or surpass the feeling of comradery and pride one finds at a midnight premiere, offers one thing – one wonderful, amazing thing – that goes beyond these lost experiences, and transcends to a level of movie-going that the midnight premiere can not match: exclusivity.

Let it roll off your tongue.  Say it slowly; pronounce each letter.  Is it not intoxicating?

At this point, you may be asking, “Chris, this is all well and good, but what does this have to do with your blog’s title, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince Advance Screening?  I mean, you haven’t even posted any pictures related to Harry Potter!”  As for the pictures, you’re absolutely right!  Allow me to rectify that:

As for the relevance, well, I’m glad you asked!  On July 2, 2009, the Fresno Beehive (@FresnoBeehive) started a giveaway contest for tickets to an advance screening of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince this Monday, July 13th; two days before the premiere.  The requirements for entry were very simple; merely comment on the post.  The winners would be randomly picked from the comments.  I immediately commented to enter myself for a chance at an advance screening of a movie I have highly anticipated.  My hopes, however, were low.  I am not generally what one would call a “winner.”  Victory does not, for the most part, lay itself at my feet.  In fact, just yesterday morning, I mentioned to Lindsey that I doubted I would win the tickets, so we would have to settle for a matinee showing on the 15th (we have urgent business on the morning of the 15th, so unfortunately, a midnight premiere was out of the question).  Imagine my surprise when, on a whim, I checked my email before bed to find that I had indeed won a pair of tickets for the advance screening!  I informed Lindsey and immediately (after a victory jig) responded to the email indicating my acceptance.

If you are one of the select few attending the advance screening with us, congratulations.  We shall see you on Monday.

If you are not, our review will be up on Tuesday.

-Because I said so

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, a film adaptation of the book with the same title, will appear in theaters in 28 days!  If you haven’t seen the first five movies, but plan on seeing this one, then please, I beg of you, watch the first five movies before going to the sixth.  If you haven’t read the books, then you need the first five movies to provide a great deal of back story and character development that will help you understand the dynamics in the sixth movie.  If you have read the books, the movies vary slightly from the books, and it will be helpful for you to connect with the characters and become accustomed to the environments presented in the films.

The countdown begins!

-Because I said so

UPDATE: Congrats to @spookygirl!! Thanks to everybody who played and we will try to have more contests/giveaways in the future!

Tonight at Sierra Vista Cinemas, otherwise known as Criterion 16, they are having an advanced screening of Away We Go starring John Krasinksi and Maya Rudolph.

The show starts at 7:30 PM and I have an extra ticket good for 2 guests.

Interested in winning the ticket? Good… here is how:

1. Follow me on Twitter – @lila82

2. I will follow you back

3. At 2:30 (which is in half an hour) I will start a fun little quiz. I ask questions, you reply to them with the correct answer.

4. First person to get 5 answers right wins!

So good luck, spread the word, and this is only good for local Twitter folk who live in or near the Fresno/Clovis area in California.

- She Who Has The Last Word

Why does the movie industry feel the need to saturate viewers with movie remakes?  Why not do something original more often?  The last few years, especially, has seen a veritable explosion of movie remakes, and it seems the trend is far from over.

Anyone remember the 1991 Phoebe Cates / Rik Mayall film Drop Dead Fred?  It was a fantastic film that, while commercial unsuccessful, gained a very large cult following and fanbase over the years.  The film was done very well, and left little room for improvement.  This, it seems, is not good enough, though.  Russell Brand, the at times annoying, at times funny British comedian with the weird hair, will be starring in the remake, written by the same man who is penning the Land of the Lost remake for Will Ferrell.  But it is not only our beloved Drop Dead Fred who is getting the makeover treatment; no, no, there is more.  Dudley Moore earned an Oscar nomination for his performance in Arthur, as the titular character, the loveable drunkard heir to a vast fortune.  The film won two Oscars of the four it was nominated for, which is an obvious sign that it needs to be remade!

And don’t get me started on the garbage “[Insert Topic Here] Movie” and “[Insert Topic Here] Flick” that studios will vomit out every four months.  The “spoofs” (if you can call them that) are filled with random pop culture mentions connected together by the loosest of plots pulled, at times, directly from the parody movie with no original spin added.  These movies give “spoof” films a bad name.  Good God, is there not an original bone left in Hollywood?  Why can’t we have more of films like The Fall, or Tristram Shandy: A Cock and Bull Story, or Pan’s Labyrinth?!  COME ON!

SERIOUSLY.  COME ON.

-Because I said so

Over the last few years, I have noticed a very disturbing trend in American cinema regarding the wanton display of full frontal male nudity.  It has become more and more acceptable for filmmakers to show the penis in film today with no warning or consideration.  Now, some people may argue, “Chris, there has been full frontal female nudity in film before.  Why is this such an issue?”

I’ll god damned tell you why.

In general, the female form is far more attractive than the male, and is generally filmed in an appealing and pleasing manner.  Such is not the case with the male form.  It seems to be used more often as a shock effect or to get cheap laughs than as an essential plot detail.

I don’t want to see giant dong on the big screen.  It’s hardly appetizing.

-Because I said so

Ok.  Last week we rented a few movies, one of which was Sukiyaki Western Django.  We just finished watching it this very moment, and I could not wait to provide the internet with my review.

It was ass.  There were some cool bits, but it should have been done in Japanese, because the actors were very awkward speaking in English, and it affected the quality of their performances.  It’s supposed to be a parody, or an homage, or something else, but it ends up just being not very good.  Some of the cinematography was interesting, and the plot was nice(ish), but it was painfully obvious that the actors were uncomfortable speaking in English.

On the plus side, we got a huge laugh out of just how bad this movie was, so maybe it wasn’t a complete waste of time after all?

Let me put it this way…You’ve heard of movies so bad that they’re good?  This movie is so bad that it’s good, and what it’s good at is being really bad.

We totally recommend it.

-Because I said so

I could try to express my shock in words, or I could show you a picture that will explain everything completely.

Feast your eyes on this:

What the crap?

I hate Hollywood.  This movie was supposed to have a September 2008 THEATER RELEASE.

THEATER.

RELEASE.

It ended up being released March 1, 2009, on Cartoon Network, with the DVD following shortly after.

Seriously.  Go look at your local Blockbuster Video and see it for yourself.

-Because I said so

I’ve been putting this review off for almost a week now so I suppose I should probably get on it.

Many of you know that Chris and I saw Watchmen last week at the local Midnight Premiere and we were blown away. Chris has already put up a review and although it was brief, he mentioned some things I will be going more in depth about.

There will be spoilers in this post so if you haven’t seen the movie then don’t read it…but the graphic novel has been out for over 20 years so if what I say comes as a spoiler to you then I am not to blame

When the lights finally went down everybody inside the theatre got pumped. We were treated to a new Wolverine trailer, in which my fears about Gambits character were reinforced, a Star Trek trailer, a trailer for a new Seth Rogen movie, and something else that I can’t remember.

Then the good stuff began. I should warn you that there are going to be a massive amount of photographs in the rest of this blog, but I hope you enjoy them. Also, if they magically are gone after a few days then you know that we got some email from Warner Bros. threatening us to take them down lol.

The opening credits were awesome. It gave us backstory on the prior super heroes in their world, The Minutemen. Here we saw the struggles in America before the 80′s along with what the Minutemen were doing. They let us get familiar with the characters without having to devote an entire half hour to them and without any dialogue.

After the credits were done, the first thing that was shown was The Comedian (played by Jefferey Dean Morgan). I couldn’t have imagined a better casting choice to portray him. From the beginning of the movie and throughout it he was consistent. What we saw was the attack on the Comedian in his home that resulted in his death. From his death a downward spiral began and the rest of the movie plays off of it. I will say that I was surprised, in a good way, over the fight scene. Chris didn’t like how they were able to punch through walls etc. since Dr. Manhattan is supposed to be the only person in their universe with any powers but I didn’t mind it. For me it added to the moment and showed just how determined the attacker was to be rid of Comedian. The special effects were great during the fight scene as well.

During that fight, one of my favorite scenes/images happened:

The way they showed the glass was amazing. It looked so realistic and you believed that this man had been tossed out of his apartment window. When he was falling in the air and down to the pavement many stories below, you never got the impression that it was green screened. I loved the effects that were used throughout the entire movie. They were never over done and that’s what made them so great. They were there to add reality and depth to the story but they never overshadowed anything.

Another thing I really loved is how they gave us more back story on all of the main characters. During the funeral for the Comedian we were given flashbacks from those who attended. It was great because it was real. At a funeral those who are there typically think of the memories they had with the deceased. I’m really glad they did it that way and it was true to the comic book.

Nite Owl remembered a time where they went to break up a riot. Instead of it being peaceful, Comedian started shooting and beating up on people.

They also showed flashbacks from Dr. Manhattans memories and another that I can’t remember right now. Around this time was when they introduced Rorschach, a fan favorite and I can easily see why. With Rorschach they did another amazing casting job. In fact, they did a great casting job for the entire film but I will admit that I was very nervous about Matthew Goode being Ozymandias. He pulled it off and I was thrilled about that.

Rorschach first entered the movie roaming the streets. He comes across the Comedians button on the pavement and uses a grappling hook to get him inside the apartment. I liked Rorchach because he wasn’t a fool. He saw the world for what it was and knew about the corruption. He definitely wasn’t a guy that could easily be duped. He had his principles and stuck to them, no matter what.

As soon as he set one foot inside the apartment he knew something went wrong. He knew somebody wanted the Comedian gone, but he didn’t know who. At first he thought it was somebody offing people with “masks” (super heroes) so he immediately went to Dr. Manhattan. If I was in his position I probably would have went to Dr. Manhattan as well.

One thing I will say that I really enjoyed about Rorschach was his mask. I loved how the “ink” on it constantly kept moving and creating new images. That was really well done.

When Rorschach got to Dr. Manhattans dwelling he found him tinkering away on a device that was meant for Ozymandias. The two of them were partnering up on a project that was supposed to help with the worlds energy crisis…. or at least that’s what Dr. Manhattan was lead to believe.

During the conversation between Rorschach and Dr. Manhattan we are finally introduced to Lori, A.K.A. Silk Spectre II who was played by Malin Akerman. Lori is the daughter of the original Silk Spectre, played by Carla Gugino, and a man whose identity wasn’t revealed until the later part of the movie.

Dr. Manhattan and Lori started off being in a relationship but as the movie progressed their relationship crumbled and it was nobodies fault. Ever since the incident, Jon (Dr. Manhattan) lacked that connection humans have with each other. Some could see it as a flaw but his eyes were opened to things that we couldn’t possibly imagine. Due to his “side effect” Dr. Manhattans relationship with Lori was affected but she continuously found comfort in the arms of Nite Owl.

Rorschach and his claims that the “masks” were threatened were dismissed by Dr. Manhattan so Rorschach was determined to figure it out on his own. Throughout different parts in the movie you get a monologue of his journal entries which were really well done. The moments in the movie where his entries can be heard fit with what is on the screen. You never get a sense of being lost or confused. Even if you never read the graphic novel you can easily follow along…. unless you lack a brain but then that is a completely different issue altogether.

The way they characters developed was nicely as well. For me, it never dragged nor did they progress too quickly. I never got the feeling like things were being rushed like in other movies. For example, a lot of die hard Star Wars fans whined and complained (rightfully so) about how quickly Anakin fell to the dark side and became Darth Vader. I’m not heavily into Star Wars and it even bothered me. With Watchmen you had none of that. Everything flowed nicely and went the same way it did in the comics which was refreshing.

The attention to detail throughout the movie was impeccable. Actual scenes from the comic were created, they used music from that era, and you truly were sucked in to that moment in time. Some people complained that the music used in the Watchmen trailers were never in the movie and as much as I would have liked to have heard “Take A Bow” by Muse (which has been stuck in my head ever since the movie came out BTW) or “The End is The Beginning is The End” by Smashing Pumpkins, it wouldn’t have fit. I’m glad that they kept with the tunes of the times even though some of them sort of sucked, like the song used when Lori and Nite Owl bump uglies.

Since Watchmen came out many people have thrown a bitch fit over Dr. Manhattan showing his big blue dong and I don’t understand why. For starters, it’s not a real penis. Also, Dr. Manhattan doesn’t have the same thought process as we do. He wouldn’t have felt shame or embarrassment. If anything, he would have felt comfortable and confident being completely starkers. I know that I could walk around the apartment all day long sans clothing but I don’t due to the fact that I leave our blinds open and I don’t think I need to be showing my “cash and prizes” to the neighbors.

I was surprised that more people didn’t get outraged over the Comedian shooting and killing the woman who was pregnant with his child, or the part involving the 6 year old girl. I will admit there were a couple of times I had to look away but it didn’t anger me nor do I judge the makers of the film for it.

I have a daughter and she is about to be 6 so the part of the movie with the little girl bothered me as a parent. I looked away when they showed her underwear in the black stove, when the two dogs were fighting over her poor leg, and when they showed the counter top covered in blood from them hacking her to bits. Do I think that it should have been taken out of the movie? No. Will it prevent me from watching Watchmen again? No. It was important to the story so I understand why it was included but I have the choice if I want to keep my eyes open during that part or not just like anybody else.

I was glad when Rorschach kicked the murderers ass. He deserved it and it would have been a very painful death – a meat cleaver to the head about a billion times.

Another thing I was surprised about was how people complained that the sex scene between Nite Owl and Lori was “gratuitous.” Get the hell out of here. You saw her bare breasts for about 20-30 seconds, you saw his man ass two different times in the movie for like 20 seconds total, and I’ve seen worse in other movies where not one word is said.

People have sex. In order to have sex, naughty bits need to be exposed. Did I see Nite Owls jingly janglies on the big screen? Nooo. Was there Silk Spectre vagina flashed about? Nope. So you saw his bare ass giving a few thrusts… big deal!!

The movie was rated “R” for a reason and it states why it is rated that way. If people neglect to notice that detail then it is their fault and not that of Zack Snyder and Co.

Some other violent highlights in the movie happened when Rorschach is in jail. Towards the middle of the movie Rorschach gets information that will help lead him to Comedians killer but he needs to ask some questions. He visits Moloch for a second time (first was asking why he attended Comedians funeral) and while he is spewing out questions, he notices that somebody has killed Moloch. At this time the police arrive and it dawns on Rorschach that he was set-up. Rorschach puts up a fight but is eventually captured.

While in jail he gets threats from the fellow inmates that they are going to finally get him since a vast majority of them were put in jail by Rorschach. During a meal time one of the inmates starts mouthing off to him and Rorschach grabs the fryer pan, with all of the hot oil, and pours it on the guy. So freaking amazing and yet painful to watch.

Another part was when they were trying to break into his cell. A guy stuck his arms in through the grates but Rorschach grabbed them, broke them, and bound them together with a cloth. In order to cut open the lock, the mans arms had to be cut off. Totally brutal but very realistic.

One of the CGI highlights was Dr. Manhattan. Every scene he was in was flawless. I never thought he was over done, I never thought he was fake, and he looked so real that he could have been sitting right next to me. Whoever was responsible for working on him is truly amazing. They did a fantastic job.

The very end of the movie has everybody at Karnak, Ozymandias’ hideout. Nite Owl and Rorschach arrive together (after Rorschach figures out that Ozymandias is the one behind it all), Lori and Dr. Manhattan arrive together after their brief stint on Mars (where Lori convinces Jon to come back to Earth and help them with Ozymandias, she also finds out that her father was the Comedian even though years before her conception he tried to rape her mother), and all of them start to let Ozymandias have it.

Unfortunately they arrive too late and he already set off an explosion in New York that killed thousands. Using the device from Dr. Manhattan, Ozymandias sets it up using the same energy frequencies so that it looks like Dr. M was the one who caused it. As a result, tensions between the United States and U.S.S.R cease and there is a peace between the two nations.

Ozymandias explains that in order to save millions sometimes you have to sacrifice thousands. Rorschach wasn’t having it and he was going to tell everybody exactly what happened. Dr. Manhattan realized that he couldn’t let Rorschach go through with that so he killed him and said goodbye to Lori.

The ending was different in the movie but it worked. It didn’t feel out of place and the way that everything had been set up by Ozymandias, you could easily see how Dr. Manhattan would take the blame. It worked out perfectly and I wasn’t disappointed. Come to think of it, the squid monster would have been awkward and there wouldn’t have been enough time to properly explain what it was, how it got there, it’s purpose… blah blah blah. The way it was done was just fine.

All in all, I really loved this movie. I can honestly say that this is the best comic movie ever, at least in my opinion. I know some people might ask me..”What about Iron Man? What about Dark Knight?” To answer that: The Dark Knight was great, don’t get me wrong, but if you took away Heath Ledgers performance you would have been left with an average movie. With Iron Man it was great but it was more of an action movie.

Watchmen made you think. It made you analyze the way that you life and the way our world is. It is an intelligent movie with depth and meaning. Sure there is violence, sure there is action, but that isn’t what this movie is about. It has a deeper purpose.

For the people with children reading this I wouldn’t suggest you take the little ones to it. There is a lot of realistic violence and like I said earlier, it is rated “R” for a reason. If the kids are adamant about attending, maybe go and see the movie yourself first and then make an educated decision whether the movie is appropriate for them and whether they are mature enough to handle the material that is presented in the film.

I highly recommend this movie for those who have read the graphic novel and for those who haven’t, so if you have yet to see the movie then stop reading this and go now!

- She Who Has The Last Word